Self Harming

redhead · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 7:01 pm Post subject:

My friends daughter as started to self harm reason not known as she won't open up sadly her arms are in a mess ,mostly the upper arm were its hidden ,mum only noticed when she walked in the bathroom and saw the cuts , her reaction was shouting which didn't help but like she said it was the shock, they have sat down and talked but mum feels she's not getting anywhere she's really concerned for her but getting help has not been easy docs don't seem that bothered ,as adughter won't go to docs and not a lot he can do until he sees her so any advice you can give Piggypetal I will pass on to her , at what age did your daughter start cutting ? my friends daughter started at 16 . so pleased things are looking better for Amber , do you now what caused her to harm if not to personal?

Piggypetal · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:19 pm Post subject:

Amber was 13 when she started late last year, she had a lot of bottled up feelings about her Dad, we split before she was born and he hasn't seen her since she was 13 months old...his decision. She just didn't know how to approach it with me so bottled it all up. On top of that she was being bullied serverly at school everything just got too much and when she couldn't handle things anymore she'd cut herself as a release. It's a bit like a pressure cooker building up inside thats the only way she could relieve things.

If she doesn't want to the see the doctor it could be she isn't ready to accept she has a problem and wants to stop. Tell your friend that no matter how hard things seem not to blame herself and if her daughter cuts herself again not to make huge deal out of it, she will be feeling guilty enough that she's done it already, now her mum knows thats the first step she needs to make sure her daughter knows if she's feeling like harming herself she's there to talk to instead. It's worth finding out if theres a local youth counselling service in your area, they may have a long waiting list but you don't need to be referred and our one here teens can contact them directly and it's the teens choice whether parents are informed at all they were fantastic with Amber. If she can find something like that they may be able to help her enough to want to pursue help from the GP.

I'll PM you in a little while with some sites and groups who may be able to help her.

Selious5 · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 5:31 pm Post subject:

Hi Sarah
just popped in to say hello and hope things are going ok for Amber and for yourself and to let you know that I am thinkin gof you both

lovexxxx

Piggypetal · Posted: Thu Oct 18, 2007 9:38 am Post subject:

Thanks Seli! It's appreciated, she's having a great time at my brother's (I've had plenty of picture messages to prove it lol). Although her break has now been extended by a few days....my sister was planning on inviting her for a few days of half term so as soon as they get home to my mum's she's picking her up so she can spend a few days with my nephews while they don't have school to interrupt their Amber time lol. So she'll be home on the 29th....I miss her but I'm glad she isn't ringing me constantly it shows just how much stronger she's become since she last went anywhere for a visit.

Piggypetal · Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 10:12 am Post subject:

Just a lil update really, Amber came home early, she decided she'd missed us too much and will go stay with my sister for a few days in a few weeks time. The break has been great for her helped her take a step back and look at things from new angles and just being able to relax and go out and about without fearing who's round the corner helped a lot. I've told her about the site and she said she'll have a nose later and will probably join up! Anyway after almost 3 weeks of peace it's manic here now as both her best freinds have come round lol It's good to have the peace shattered again though.

Serenity · Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 10:15 am Post subject:

That's great Sarah! Im so glad Amber has had some time away and enjoyed herself, even if it was cut short. All kids get homesick so she's no different.

You're like me, I bet you love all the comotion of having kids and their mates around you lol MAD aren't we!

Piggypetal · Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 11:17 am Post subject:

Thumper · Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 11:42 am Post subject:

That's really good news Sarah, I bet you are glad to have her home, It will lovely if she joins here, will be nice to get to know her

_________________
Shelley xx

Selious5 · Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 1:08 pm Post subject:

So glad that things are going better Sarah for Amber and yourself at the moment. How would she feel if she joined the site and found she had been discussed here? Could she handle that at the moment? It would certainly give her an interest and there are lots of goods things to do on here as well as other good-hearted people. Perhaps a consideration, if she decided to join and you felt a little anxious about this thread, then it could be deleted. I am sure no-one would mind under the circumstances. Just a wee suggestion

Piggypetal · Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 5:27 pm Post subject:

Thanks for the concern Seli, Amber's fully aware of the thread and is fine with it, if she can help someone else deal with self harming she's all for it.